Though you do not have control over your partner’s violence, you do have a choice about how to get yourself and your children to safety. Leaving must be done with a careful plan. Abusers often become more violent when they believe their partner is leaving the relationship.
Safety During a Violent Incident
- Practice getting out safely. What doors, windows, elevators, stairwells, or fire escapes would you use?
- Keep your purse and car key where you can get to them in order to leave quickly.
- Tell neighbors about the violence and ask that they call the police if they hear suspicious noises coming from your home.
- Teach your children to use the phone to contact the police and fire department.
- When you anticipate an argument, avoid the bathroom, garage, kitchen and other areas near weapons or rooms without access to an outside door.
Safety when preparing to leave:
- Keep copies of important documents, keys, extra clothes and money with a friend or family member.
- Keep our crisis line number – 314.531.2003 – with you or memorize it.
- Check with friends or family members to see who would be able to let you stay with them or lend you money.
- Rehearse your escape plan and, if appropriate, practice it with your children
Items to Take When Leaving
- Identification for yourself
- Your birth certificate
- School and vaccination records
- Credit cards
- Insurance papers
- Keys – house, car, office
- Work permits/green card
- Children’s birth certificates
- Social Security cards
- ATM card, checkbook
- Bank books
- Children’s favorite toy/blanket
- Lease/house deed
- Welfare identification
To receive a copy of the entire Safety Planning Guide, call AWARE at Barnes-Jewish Hospital at 314.362.9273.Back to All News